


Shift

by AlexandrianSight



Series: Killing You is Hard [5]
Category: Portal (Video Game)
Genre: Dreams, F/F, Flashbacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-10
Updated: 2016-09-10
Packaged: 2018-08-14 06:47:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8002459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexandrianSight/pseuds/AlexandrianSight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i> "She heard a shift in the silence surrounding her" </i>
</p>
<p>Mere days after searching through Caroline's old office, Chell wakes from a dream about her...or was it more than just a dream?</p>
<p>Either way, it's become obvious that there is some sort of puzzle surrounding Caroline, one that Chell doesn't have enough pieces to solve. She's become determined to figure out this mystery. But first, there are more pressing matters to attend to...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shift

**Author's Note:**

> I have to admit, I'm not exactly happy with this fic. There are certain concepts I tried to portray in it that I'm not sure I expressed properly. The problem is that I'm always exhausted when I'm writing lately, which does not help with the writing process. 
> 
> I've spent too long on this fic, though, and I think the best thing would be for me to post it and listen to the feedback from y'all. So please, leave a comment after reading!

_“She’s one of the best test subjects we’ve ever had!”_

_The voice - a woman’s voice, and so familiar - was hostile and assertive. It sounded both distant yet close, echoing through a space that Chell didn’t recognize. She stood in a white room. A test chamber. Except there was no test. There was no puzzle to solve, no exit or entrance, not even a window for an observatory area. Just white panels._

_“She’s dangerous!” A man’s voice this time, one she didn’t recognize. It had the same echoing quality as the woman’s. Chell turned to face it, only to realize that the sound was coming from both everywhere and nowhere._

_Chell slowly turned around, studying the room. She tried to figure out this nonexistent puzzle while voices echoed around her._

_“_ We’re _dangerous,” the woman argued. Chell knew she’d heard that voice somewhere before. “She could be the key to figuring out-”_

_“She’s not the key to figuring out anything! She’s risked her own life and the lives of our scientists too many times. We’re shutting it down.”_

_One of the walls changed so it resembled a giant, ethereal screen. She watched as a faceless man wrote out familiar words on a test file._

**_Test subject is abnormally stubborn. She never gives up. Ever._ **

_Chell stared with a feeling of dread as he then grabbed a stamp and aggressively stamped the paper. She knew what the words were even before the stamp was lifted. Rejected. Do Not Test._

_“She’s going into an extended relaxation chamber after she finishes this test. For an indefinite amount of time,” He said as the scene faded and Chell was met with a white wall again._

_The woman spoke again, sounding irritated. “You’re putting your own interests before that of the company.”_

_“It seems that_ you’re _the one putting your interests above Aperture’s.”_

_“Don’t you forget who you’re speaking to.” Her controlled fury made her voice sound even more familiar to Chell._

_“With all due respect, ma’am,” The man’s tone was boastful. “You’re only going to be in charge for so much longer.”_

_The voices stopped talking, and Chell stood in the silent room for a few minutes, still trying to solve the puzzle that wasn’t there. She suddenly heard a shout from behind her and turned to see another ethereal screen._

_“Get your hands off of me!”_

_A woman - an older woman, with silver hair up in a bun - was being restrained by multiple faceless scientists. Chell watched in horror as she struggled against them. She was strong for her age, fervently twisting and turning in an attempt to break free._

_“What’s the meaning of this?” She shouted. “We had an agreement!”_

_“We agreed to wait until the project was finished, and it is,” A faceless scientist calmly replied as he supervised. “Please, ma’am, struggling will only make this more painful for yourself.”_

_“That wasn’t our agreement!” She shouted, fear and anger prevalent in her voice._

_“If we wait until you die, there’s no guarantee that it’ll work,” His voice remained calm._

_She continued to struggle, her hair falling from its bun and into her face. She looked up and she made eye contact with Chell, who suddenly recognized her._

_Caroline._

_As their eyes locked, the scene froze and the setting around Chell changed. She was no longer looking at the woman on a screen, but through a window to her right. She looked around to see that she was no longer in a testing chamber, but in a hallway. A faceless scientist had a firm grip on her arm, escorting her back to her relaxation chamber._

_She turned to look back at Caroline and the scene continued to play out, but everything seemed to move in slow motion. Caroline’s eyes were wide in fear and were pleading for help. Chell had an instinctive need to help her. She pulled against the scientist escorting her, but she was incapable of moving, as though she were fastened to a pole. She opened her mouth to shout, to scream. Maybe she could get the attention of someone who could help this woman. Maybe she could startle the scientists so that Caroline could escape._

_But that wasn’t how this scene played out. Her voice caught in her throat, incapable of use. Chell never spoke, not even for this. In fact, she’d never opened her mouth. She’d never even struggled against the scientist. Instead, she’d just watched in horror as Caroline was taken away._

_Chell had felt guilty, but there was nothing she could’ve done. She herself was restrained. She was also sedated after some testing incident she couldn’t remember. She was capable of walking and being guided, but incapable of doing anything except watch in horror as Caroline was taken away._

_She watched as a different scientist leaned in and muttered something in Caroline’s ear. Chell couldn’t hear it, but whatever it was caused Caroline to give up her fight with a shuddering breath. Tears fell from her eyes as she hung her head, her silver hair falling even more into her face._

_Chell turned to face forward and saw that the setting had changed again. She was now surrounded by a destroyed Aperture, covered in plants and flooded with brown water. She was frozen in fear as the newly resurrected GLaDOS hung before her._

_“I’ve been really busy being dead. You know, after you MURDERED ME.”_

 

Chell shot up in her bed, her gasp mixed with a shriek. Her body was covered with cold sweat and her sheets were tangled around her legs.

Panting, Chell put her head in her hands. As unpleasant as it had been, she forced herself to go over the events of her dream multiple times, afraid that she would forget it otherwise. It all felt so real. Was it just a dream, or was it a memory?

As she struggled to catch her breath, she heard a shift in the silence surrounding her. GLaDOS must’ve heard her scream and was now paying attention to the room, trying to listen to see if Chell did anything else. It stayed in its night cycle, though.

_That’s right,_ Chell thought, trying to reassure herself, trying to calm her panic. GLaDOS didn’t want to kill her. Not anymore. A lot had changed since she’d been resurrected over a year ago.

She sighed and rubbed her eyes. There was no point in trying to go back to sleep; surely GLaDOS was going to switch the room to its day cycle at any moment. Her gaze fell on the photo album on her desk. Curious, she moved her sheets aside so she could get out of bed.

As soon as her feet touched the floor, the silence shifted again. It was best described as a subtle, muffled click indicating that GLaDOS was about to say something. Chell stopped, waiting to see what she had to say. Instead, though, the room stayed quiet. No voice rang out.

Chell heard the subtle click again. GLaDOS had changed her mind. Chell was confused, wondering why she’d decided not to make some snide comment like she normally would. She didn’t even switch the room to its day cycle like she usually did if Chell woke up early.

Brushing it off, Chell opened up the photo album, quickly flipping to the last page. There it was. The photo she’d found of an older Caroline.

Chell stared at the picture, trying to figure out if the Caroline she’d seen in her dream was simply one conjured up by her brain based off of this photo, or if it was actually a memory.

The clothes were different. Dream Caroline had been wearing a completely different outfit from the one in the photo, an outfit that Chell wasn’t inclined to think her own subconscious had designed. Her makeup had been different, too.

Her brow furrowed in thought. So maybe that really _was_ a memory. Maybe she really did have to watch helplessly as Caroline was taken away to who knows where-

No. Chell knew where. She ran her hand through her hair and sighed. It couldn’t be. There was no way she’d _actually_ witnessed the moment that Caroline had been taken so she could become GLaDOS. It was too coincidental.

Or was it?

Chell closed the album. Either she was living too much in her own head, or there was some puzzle surrounding Caroline - and herself - that she didn’t yet have nearly enough pieces to solve.

Acting on impulse, Chell put on her long fall boots over her pajama pants. She grabbed her portal gun and made her way to the door. It was locked.

After trying it a few times, she heaved a sigh. “What are you doing?”

She heard the shift, but it was a few moments before GLaDOS spoke. “You’ve only had three hours of sleep. It’s the middle of the night.”

“It’s the middle of the night _cycle_ in this room,” Chell corrected, irritated.

It took a few moments for GLaDOS to speak again. “Humans need approximately seven to eight hours of sleep in order to function properly.”

Chell pursed her lips and tugged on the door again. When it still didn’t give, she kicked it out of frustration. She addressed GLaDOS again. “My sleep schedule is none of your business.”

“It _is_ my business when you practically have free reign over my facility. Low energy levels make humans more dangerous, and given your already high capacity for danger, I’d rather not let you loose in this state.”

“I’m not even tired,” Chell argued.

“That’s a lie.”

Chell blinked in surprise. “What?”

“If you weren’t tired, you would have stopped talking by now. You might not have even started.”

Chell sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Fine. I’m tired. Congratulations. But this isn’t the first time I’ve gotten out of bed in the middle of the night. Why stop me now and not any other time?”

GLaDOS took a moment to respond. “You screamed. When you woke up.”

Chell felt heat rise to her face and was grateful that GLaDOS couldn’t see her. “And?”

“It was...concerning,” She explained. “I’ve never heard you scream before.”

Chell felt her blush deepen. “I- ” She stopped to take a breath. “It was just a dream, that’s all. Nothing for you to be worried abou-”

“I wasn’t worried,” GLaDOS quickly interrupted.

Chell found this odd but brushed it off, tugging on the door again. “Look, I-” She sighed. “I just need to walk around, okay? I need to _do_ something.”

“You can _do_ something in the morning when you’re sufficiently rested.” There was a pause before she finished. “And less of a danger to my facility.”

Frustrated, Chell slammed her fist against the door. “You can’t trap me like this!”

“I’m _not_ trapping you,” She argued. “I’m preventing you from causing unnecessary trouble. I’d rather not let you wander around in this state just to put _your_ life in danger agai-”

Her voice cut off, and after a moment Chell heard the shift again. She was gone. Completely gone from the room, not even listening. Confused, Chell hesitantly tried the door. It opened easily.

She glanced back into her room. The easiest thing would just be to go back to bed. But she was confused by GLaDOS’s words. She really thought that Chell would put her own life in danger just because she was sleep-deprived? That was rich coming from the person who’d purposefully deprived her of sleep for the sake of testing - in highly lethal environments, too. Plus, she had been with Chell for most of the trip through Old Aperture. She’d done that without even the help of the adrenal vapors that were constantly pumped into the enrichment center.

So why should she care now?

Chell sighed and stepped out of her room, noting that the cameras didn’t track her as she made her way through the facility.

When she reached the door, she hesitated for a moment before opening it. As she walked in, GLaDOS slightly turned to look at her before turning back away from her.

“You look pale.”

Chell sighed. “That’s what happens when someone spends a month underground with no sunlight.” _Other than the hard-light bridges,_ She added in her head.

GLaDOS turned to face her again. “I think you forget that you’re not trapped down here for the rest of your life. You’re here of your own accord, remember? You can leave whenever you want. There’s an elevator straight to the surface.”

Chell scoffed. “Right, so long as I ask your permission.”

GLaDOS stared at her for a moment, looked up at the ceiling, then turned away again. After a moment, Chell heard a noise and turned to see a wall panel near the door move aside, revealing a button.

“Press that button for the elevator,” GLaDOS explained dismissively. “It’ll always be there as an option.”

Chell stared at the button, then turned back to face the chassis, confusion obvious on her face.

“I told you. You’re not trapped here. You seem to be aware of all of the changes regarding your life in this facility except for that one fact. You’re free to go to the surface - you were always free to go to the surface, ever since you came back. Although, I trust you’d at least have the decency to let me know if you ever leave with no intentions of returning.”

Chell stared at her, stunned. She glanced back at the button, observing it for a few moments before turning and leaving through the door. She didn’t need to look to know that GLaDOS was curiously watching her leave.

She didn’t want to go to the surface. Not now, at least. It was hard to explain why, but simply put, Chell didn’t feel that she was _ready_ to go back up. Life on the surface and life in Aperture had always been two very separate things, never connected or intertwining. It was one or the other, not both. If she went back up now, she’d be fully acknowledging that they were now connected. And she just wasn’t ready to do that.

She made her way back to her room with the intention of eating something. She checked her mini-fridge even though she knew there was nothing but water in it. Her stockpile of food from the surface had run out a week ago. Holding back a groan, Chell opened up a drawer and grabbed a can of beans.

Aperture was quite minimalistic with its food-labelling. The cans only read “beans,” which meant it was a surprise as to what kind of beans Chell would get with each can.

She took out her pocket knife and set to work opening the can. It was just like her old one, which she’d sorely missed while she was on the surface. She didn’t have an exact idea of when she lost it, but her safest bet that it was while she was up against Wheatley. Or maybe it had fallen out in space.

Chell shuddered at the memory. She’d been put through a lot ever since becoming an Aperture test subject, but nothing had been as terrifying as being sucked into space with the only thing keeping her grounded to Earth being Wheatley’s weak attachment to GLaDOS’s chassis. When GLaDOS had taken control again and reached out to smack Wheatley into space, Chell had really thought that was going to be the end of it, that she would be sent into space with him.

She shuddered again and tried to push the memory out of her mind. She finished opening the can and pried off the lid. Lima beans. Her least favorite. Chell grimaced and speared one with her knife, doing her best to shake off the slimy juice before eating it. She quickly swallowed it whole, trying not to taste it, trying not to gag.

She supposed she should count herself lucky that the beans were still somehow edible after so many years, but the vile taste prevented that from happening. The canned beans were all pre-cooked, of course, but she wished she at least had some way of heating them up. Maybe that would curb the taste a little bit.

With a sigh, she speared another bean.

 

_“Do you really think now is a good time for this?” GLaDOS’s voice was as berating as always, but the fact that it was now coming from a potato softened its edge considerably._

_Chell ignored her as she took out her pocket knife and set to work, struggling to open the can of beans she’d found. Her portal gun was lying on a desk near her, and the potato watched as she worked._

_“At this rate, that moron will have destroyed my facility before you’ve finished eating.”_

_Chell rolled her eyes and ignored her again. She knew what was at stake. She’d also rather not take the time to eat, but Old Aperture was not pumped full of simulated daylight and adrenal vapors like the enrichment center was. Her appetite was catching up to her, and her hands had been shaky in that last testing sphere. She couldn’t risk a mistake, not now._

_She was just glad she’d taken a short nap before she’d found that potato again. There was no way GLaDOS would’ve let her rest._

_She finished prying open the can and checked what kind of beans they were. Lima. Chell grimaced._

_“I would’ve given up on this entirely and just let the bird have me if I’d known you were going to waste time stuffing your fat face-”_

Thunk!

_GLaDOS’s words were cut off when Chell stabbed her knife into the soft wood of the desk right in front of the potato’s yellow optic. She glared at her coldly. When she was sure her message was received, she removed her knife and used it to spear a bean._

_She hesitated. There was no way of knowing if these beans were even still edible, it had been so long. But she had no other options. She put the bean in her mouth and started chewing. Bad idea._

_Chell gagged and put the can down on the desk so she could cover her mouth. She used her hand to hold her mouth shut tight and forced herself to swallow the bean. Part of her, the part that was able to detach itself from the absolute agony of eating the bean, wondered how much self-control it was taking GLaDOS not to laugh at her._

_She glanced at the potato. GLaDOS just sat there, watching her. Granted, it wasn’t as though she could move in this state._

_Chell sighed and sat down on the edge of the desk. She speared another bean and put it in her mouth, quickly swallowing it this time. She wished she had water._

_“And if you die from eating those beans, I’m supposed to...what? Sit here and wait for someone else to come along?”_

_Chell shrugged nonchalantly, keeping her eyes on the bean can. She knew the risk she was taking, but she had no choice. They both sat in silence for a few moments as she continued eating._

_“You’d better not die.” Her voice sounded small, like she was afraid. Chell glanced over at her, then looked away thoughtfully. She understood that feeling. If these beans managed to kill her, GLaDOS would be left alone down here. Completely isolated and incapable of doing anything to help herself. She would be completely alone, potentially forever, given the fact that the potatoes from the science fair were still powering their batteries even after so many years._

_Chell continued eating. Swallowing the beans whole was a lot faster and much less painful, but it left her a bit less satisfied than she should be._

_GLaDOS spoke up after a while. “Listen, I-”_

_She was cut off again, this time by a rumble coming from above them. Dust fell from the ceiling with a slight tremor, and Chell knew she wouldn’t get to finish her beans._

_“Time’s up, we have to go,” GLaDOS said as Chell put down the can and put her knife back in her pocket. She stood and grabbed the gun, navigating through the office and back onto the testing track._

_“Whatever that was managed to reach us down here,” GLaDOS speculated. “Which means either it was something big, or we’re getting close.”_

_Chell nodded as she shot a portal so she could get into the next sphere._

 

Chell sighed as she eyed the last bean, wondering if it was worth it to eat it. She took a moment to mentally prepare herself before quickly forcing it down. She gulped down some water, then stood up and dumped the bean juice down her sink. She turned on the water to rinse it out before throwing it away, then brushed her teeth to get rid of the taste.

She couldn’t keep living off of beans, even if they wouldn’t actually kill her.

She changed out of her pajamas and grabbed the backpack she’d found the other day. Aperture-brand, of course. She picked up her gun and headed toward the door, but stopped before opening it, thinking. She turned back and grabbed her jacket from her closet, stuffing it into the backpack before leaving.

She made her way back to GLaDOS’s chamber. When she walked in, she didn’t turn around to acknowledge her, instead staying focused on monitors that Chell couldn’t quite see.

Chell eyed her for a moment before pressing the button on the wall. She put her gun down on the floor - she wouldn’t need it on the surface - and waited as the elevator appeared halfway across the room.

As she got on and it ascended, GLaDOS didn’t turn to watch her until she was almost out of the room.

Chell had plenty of time to think on the long ride to the surface. She wondered why GLaDOS was acting strangely. She wondered about her dream.

When she opened the shed door, Chell was surprised to see that it really _was_ the middle of the night. The full moon lit up the sky, and a cold wind blew past her. She quickly put on the jacket, glad that she’d grabbed it. She zipped it up and crossed her arms for warmth as she made her way through the wheat field.

It was clearly autumn, now. So much had changed in the month she’d been underground. The leaves on the trees were various colors and falling to the ground, and a gentle breeze wound its way through the trees. The fresh, cool air helped to wake her up a bit more.

Chell took a deep breath, letting the smell of nature calm her. Her boots sunk into the earth as she walked - she hadn’t missed that. She took her time wandering amongst the trees for a few minutes until she stumbled upon a jackpot.

In front of her was an apple tree, full and ready to harvest. She immediately set to work checking apples before picking them, wishing she had another bag. She knew she couldn’t stuff the thing with only apples.

She packed about ten and comforted herself with the knowledge that she could come back up and get more at any time.

In the tree next to it, there was a beehive. Chell moved a bit closer and noticed that it was abandoned. She idly wondered what happened to the colony before realizing that they’d left a store of honey. She made a mental note to come back with a container. Hopefully no wild animal will touch it in the meantime.

Chell continued wandering, plucking the edible mushrooms she recognized whenever she came across them. She found pecans and almonds, stuffing them in the small front pocket of the backpack.

She continued in this fashion until her bag was pretty much full. She decided to rest out here, sitting up against a tree and letting the fresh air soothe her. It was calm and peaceful out here.

After a while, she stood back up. She was cold and tired, ready to go back to bed. She made her way back to the shed and got back in the elevator.

When she landed in GLaDOS’s chamber and made her way to the exit, picking up her gun, GLaDOS turned to watch her but didn’t say anything. As she walked through the facility, the cameras tracked her, but GLaDOS still didn’t say anything.

Feeling exhausted, Chell didn’t even bother unpacking the backpack or changing her clothes. Instead, she set it down near her desk, took off her boots, and collapsed onto the bed, letting out a relaxed sigh as she pulled up her sheets, still fighting off the chill. She instinctively knew GLaDOS was paying attention, listening to the room.

There was a shift in the silence, but she didn’t say anything. Chell waited, but there was no voice. There was another shift. She’d changed her mind, but she was still listening.

Chell rolled onto her side, already starting to feel herself drift off. Whatever it was GLaDOS was wanting to say, she’d say it eventually. Probably at a time when Chell wasn’t about to fall asleep.

Still, she didn’t let herself fully drift off until she heard the silence shift again, letting her know that GLaDOS was no longer focused on the room.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! This one was difficult to work through, mostly because I wrote most of it in the dead of night after working late, so I was always suuuper tired which does not make for good writing.
> 
> I also have a few announcements!
> 
> Given my schedule and constant tiredness, I don't think my brain is as trusted as it used to be in the case of characterizations and plot consistency (it might show in this fic, I legitimately don't know). With this in mind, I think I need one or more beta readers to keep me on track.
> 
> If you want to become a beta, please contact me via ask box or private message on my [ tumblr ](alexandriansight.tumblr.com)
> 
> Or you can [ email ](mailto:%20schneeprinzessin24@gmail.com) me!
> 
> Also, I've created a [ patreon! ](https://www.patreon.com/alexandriansight) Donations would be very much appreciated!
> 
> Comments are always welcome!


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